So there are two lifestyle events happening this weekend that I’m sort of interested in attending. But I’m also reluctant because of the recent breakup. I don’t want to go and be emotionally vulnerable and mistake sex for genuine interest/attraction/affection. And I’m also uncertain whether I would date someone I met in the lifestyle again. Dating T showed me that working backwards from the sexual connection isn’t easy for me. Maybe it would be for others but not for me. I value the emotional and non-sexual physical connections more than I realized.

So going when I’m feeling needy and wanting attention could be not good. Or it could be a great way to get things moving again. And I’m quite certain that I want to get in the game again – I like being in a relationship.